nobody needs friends

isn’t it fun? that… things are so different now than they were a month ago. i can’t connect to u anymore. haha. so fun. great. i’m so tired of trying to talk to u when u’re just not interested.

 

i think i really cannot communicate with my peers. that just goes to show i’m anti social, i’m a weirdo. sometimes, i think life is really better off without friends. life might even be good when u just have random guys in ur life. isn’t that cool.. needn’t think about how to maintain a friendship. u dont even need to feel obligated to meddle in a friend’s affairs. just let that person rot and die. because most of the time, u get too touchy, they get pissed. so what’s the point of showing ur concern to anybody for that matter? nobody appreciates. i’m washing my hands off all earthly affairs!

 

maybe i should just pack my bag and fly somewhere after my graduation. disappear from singapore. go and meet new people. be an "internationalist". and oh, i need to save up for that myanmar trip with foe. mmm it should be fun.

 

i’ll keep that thought of leaving singapore in my mind. when the opportunity arises, i’ll jump at it. adios.

row with paddles, swim with jellyfish

what an eventful day! went kayaking iwth xl. oleh! she finally bought her aquasox. really.. kayaking with aquasox is so much more convenient! i neednt need to keep worrying where has my stupid slippery havianas floated to. and i neednt have the yucky honour to step on squishy sea bed. yeah anyway… was nice. high tide. and man, to paddle really fast against the waves was WONDERFUL! the water kept splashing into myu face, my eyes, my body. wow… exhiliarating!!!! and yeah.. i capsized.. because i wanted to practice climbing back into the kayak. and goodness gracious. guess who i saw?? sponge’s friends… the jellyfish!!!!!!! first i was tryin to get onto the kayak… and i looked in front. damn! a jellyfish. i’ve have thought it was cute if it was just a harmless fish. but a jellyfish!!! i didnt wanna get stung! yeah so i concentrated… but i couldnt… i fell back in. and looked to my left. another one. so i tried another attempt to jump up onto the kayak. shit!!! a SCHOOL Of them!!! and xl looked at her side.. she saw 2, and 1 at the other side. damn.. we were surrounded by jellyfish. it was such a terrifying experience. really TERRIFYING. OMIGOD. i was so scared…. hope i didnt get stung. but i’m kinda paranoid now. still.

 

so after that we went to the club’s bbq. it was pretty alrite… i had quite a few bottles of asahi. nice!!!! i think it tastes better than brewerks.. somehow. hehehe.. now i need to get some sleep. gd nite!

hm.

how come people like to stress me up??!! OVER NOTHING??!!! great. someone thinks i’m a scatterbrain and that i need to work under pressure then will i perform. wth!

 

anyway, yesterday qx and i went out with eating. so fun! we went carl’s jr.. and shared 2 meals. but we were really full after that… went shopping around for michelle’s pressie. never knew it’d be so difficult to get something for a simple girl who doesnt wear make up, watches, accessories…. she’s realy simple. yeah.. so we had a hard time. finally settled for a puma sweater which all ofus really liked a lot – we hope it’d be ours. but of course… it’ll never be ours 😛 it’s for our dear michelle. haa… yeah so we chatted and laughed quite a bit. really nice.

 

goin kayaking later.. although there’ll only be 2 or 3 of us. but… i still wanna go kayak.

erick

the same shit has to happen to me again.

 

erick.. my ex-best friend. we used to have so much fun together. teasing each other, teasing others, hanging out, bickering at each other.. those were such fun times. i thought i’d have you for life – but things took an unexpected twist as you landed in a trap set by a group of indecent friends. we tried hard to pull u back, but it was impossible. that was it. i just lost a friend. even though you ran hard away from us, i never let you disappear from my heart, my memories. when i think of u, i think of the good old times we shared. shameless to say, i wish we could be like that again. but i know too, that things will never be the same. a single small thing can cause a friendship. it’s proven again and again.

 

probably i’m just good for a friend. not good for a good friend.

 

i don’t seem to know you anymore. what happened to the old you? we used to talk alot.. . we could joke. and u’d understand my joke. now? i dont think you know the meaning of a good joke, and a good laugh. i’ve lost you totally. things will never be the same again. i can’t believe i can talk less than 5 sentences to you. well done. stranger. not only do i find u a stranger, but everyone else. all our friends around us. they find you a complete stranger. u’ve changed so much, i think u must be possessed. fuck. give me back my friend. but i know.. the soul is willing, the heart is not. we all make personal choices. and you have chose your path – it’s quite clear. i dont know.

 

i should just sum it off with pris’ famous quote – or something to that effect "we will never need to change friends if we can accept the fact that people change"

is your moustach the source of your knowledge?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QOqXlbWf9Io

 

omg u must watch this.. it’s just hilarious

 

anyway.. today’s HARI RAYA!! selemat hari raya and happy ramazan celebrations, my muslim friends! please bring me sweet and delicious cakes! teeheehee~

 

i’m bound to go for an eyebrow plucking session. i just plucked off a portion of my eyebrow. it looks terrible now.

sex – i-seek-u’s crazy taglines

"sex is Like Mathematics…
ADD the Bed,
MINUS the Light,
SUBTRACT the Clothes,
DIVIDE the Legs,
And get Ready to MULTIPLY….

sex is Evil,
Evil is sin,
Sin’s forgiven,
So get stuck in."

"Hi there, this is Joshua.Is it true that most Asian women do not remove the hair from their armpits ?"

"My mama told me that m*sturbating is good for health. Can you teach me how? I am 13 years old by the way"

how juvenile people can be!!!

wobbly goggle

shit man, shit… so many stuffs in my mind lately. i just feel so god damn alone. though i know i probably am not THAT alone. but i just…. sigh. u know, the feeling?

 

why is it so difficult to get people together? Don’t people understand the very essence of COMMUNICATION, of NETWORKING, of SOCIALIZING??!!! where do they think they are living? *i can’t give a concrete example right now* but do they seriously think they can live life just knowing a miserable bunch of people? and keep running away from social events? why do people EVER throw away chances and opportunities when they can meet new people?! Is this singapore or is this HERMIT LAND? i simply cannot understand!!

 

after happily buying a pair of aquasox. i have to get news that tomorrow’s session is cancelled. why? because someone refuses to get his ass off his bed at 9:30am. and because the others just think kayaking is just – an interest. an interest in which they can choose to take up and cast aside whenever they like. oh well, they have a choice. i seriously don’t give a damn whether they come or not. i just wanna go out and do my own thing, to try to kayak better. and i want them to try to at least practice their skills before they go for the second level of their course. oh well, perhaps all of them are BORN kayakers. and also, i wouldn’t be feeling this shitty if :

 

1. i am not setting up booth alone early before everyone arrives

2. i have not prepared brochures

3. i have not called up people to sign up for course

4. someone have not pushed me to do things

5. someone havent bought food for chocolate

6. people dont find singapore such a huge place that it’s a chore to get from end to end of the island

7. people not attending gatherings simply because they don’t know each other – isn’t that the whole point of a gathering

8. i know who to find to help me with the booth (though i’m very grateful i found one very willing soul. i am so entirely grateful)

9. i can stop suspecting my partner is leaving me in the lurch

10. my dad is not drunk

 

i am SO ALONE. goddamn it. i’m a freak, a loner, a nobody. i got no friends, no boyfriend, just a silly crush. my dear.. u are SUCH A LOSER!!! FUCK U FUCK U FUCK U!! U ARE BETTER OFF DEAD! NOBODY WILL EVEN CARE IF U WERE DEAD. AND UR FAMILY SURE WILL NOT GET 400k WORTH OF *what’s that called.. money a family receives from people during the wake?* DURING UR WAKE! BUT STILL, U RATHER GO AND DIE AND LIVE LIFE AS A FUCKING MISERABLE LONER!

 

my grandma just turned 91 today. happy that her grandchildren came to see her. but i feel rather sad…. i really dont wish to count the days she’ll be sleeping beside me for…. i’ll really miss her if she’s gonna go away. i love her. lately she’s been behaving rather oddly. too much hugs, kisses, attention. it’s making us worry – all of us. she told my cousin "bring ur newborn baby today. i fear it’d be my last chance seeing her."

i’m jealous.

had a wonderful time chatting with chocolate today… talked abt quite a lot of stuff. happy.. but reality crashed down when a girl brought him macdonalds!!!! oh god… is that his gf??!! dun seem like it.. but there might be chances that I HAVE RIVALS!!! who asked him to be so cute -_-"

haze, i hate u!

THOUGH it’s kinda cool to walk around in a misty weather, the smell sure ain’t worth it! plus that charred smell hanging in the air.. and u get irritated throats.

 

looks are deceiving. haze, u caused me to have a sore throat. and i always thought i was strong enough to defy u. but look.. i’m down with flu now. sob sob! how am i going to the gym tomorrow!?? i’m missing my combat class because of u!! u goondoo!!!

 

i can be pretty lame at times. like at marketing class today. patricia said there was this girl in another class who gave an example of a new product – the 2 way panty liner. i dont know what brand is that. but it’s kinda funny. can u imagine a british guy reading her scripts.

 

" An example of such a product, would be the 2-way panty liner introduced by *Flyway. How it works, is that it has this flap in which u are suppose to stick to your panties. Stick to the part that comes into direct contact with your peehole. When you observe that the pad is completely soiled, you can just pull the top pad and tadaa! you may now proceed to use the underlying fresh pad. how innovative Flyway had been!"

 

i can just feel the marker frowning. he might even be kind enough to add "bollocks". or perhaps, to aid in his imagination, he might take his script and walk to his female colleague "mdm, do you have any idea in which this young singaporean lady is trying to talk about?" and my suggestion??!! perhaps this candidate should just attach the 2-way panty liner to the examination scripts. wouldn’t it be kinda cool? this way, we neednt use the damn white thread to tie the scripts together – this panty liner has this adhesive side in which u can use it to bind the sheets together. isn’t that what we call, INNOVATIVE?! singaporeans ARE INDEED creative!

 

probably… another friendship down the drain

not that we’re no longer friends. but we’re not close to each other anymore. i just don’t understand. why did things turn out this way. probably i was too harsh. but still… i believe i didnt say anything as grave enough as to put a halt to a friendship.

 

we aren’t even talking like we were in the past. now i feel like how dee feels about her. totally off. i dont even know what to talk to her but about serious stuff. i feel so suffocated. oh well, it’s probably better to lose me as a friend – in the first place, i don’t even cut it to make a good friend. adios, if that’s what u want it to be. i respect ur decision.